I am a fundametalist

That's right -- without the "n."

What? What's that? Oh, I'm sorry. Got nothing to say?

Of course you don't.

Led Zeppelin has silenced the naysayers. Cookie Monster metal bands et al., take note:

You've. Been. Owned.

Jimmy Page and friends have just shown y'all why metal has heavy in front of it.

And while you and others have all meandered into your derivative sects and denominations of this genre, I, and the Zeppelin fans who stand with me, remain true to its fundametalist roots.

Please, please...make it stop

"What we still don't understand is why you Americans stopped the bombing of Hanoi. You had us on the ropes. If you had pressed us a little harder, just for another day or two, we were ready to surrender. It was the same at the battle of Tet. You defeated us. We knew it. We thought you knew it. But we were elated to notice that your media was definitely helping us. They were causing more disruption in America than we could in the battlefield. We were ready to surrender. You had won."

-General Giap of the North Vietnamese Army, writing in his recently published memoirs